Bean Salad...good for the soul!

Bodacious Bean Salad

It's finals time... is anyone as overwhelmed as me?

UGHH, but then I felt guilty for not updating this blog, and then I ripped my hair out.

And then realized I haven't pooped since Saturday. (It's Monday. I realize that this is normal for some people. Not me. My intestines are like a taffy-pulling machine.)

Anyway, I figured that I needed some fiber, some protein, and something quick and simple to make so I can work on this damned final revision for my writing workshop.

Here's what I came up with:

Mix together in a big ceramic bowl:

One can red beans, drained and rinsed

One can white (Great Northern) beans, drained and rinsed

One half of an onion, chopped (I used white, but red would be better)

1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro

2 T. chopped fresh parsley (optional)

1 jalapeno, diced

3/4 cup chopped celery

1 T. minced garlic

2 T. plus 2 t. olive oil

4 t. balsamic vinegar

A hearty shake of black pepper

Here's what it looks like up close.

You can eat it by itself, dump it on top of a bed of lettuce, mix it with some cooked rice, smear it on top of a sour cream covered tortilla chip... whatever you want!

You should probably pair it with wine or marijuana, you know, if you're stressed.

Did I just say that?!

And if all else fails, and you are just too frazzled to muster the composure to create a bean salad, just go get yerself a nice Chicago-style veggie dog.

And annihilate that shit.

See you after finals.

Love,

Sophia

FINALS.

I have lots of things on the way!

Homemade Pizza

Almond Fish with Jalepeno Aioli

Fresh Salsa (and a movie-quote contest!)

Give me some time, my loves, it's finals time!

Sophia

"A Fort Wayne Favorite!"

Almond-Crusted Walleye with Jalepeno Aioli

Here are your ingredients:

Butter (from a ceramic cow, yes), almonds, bread crumbs (homemade or store-bought), olive oil, lemon, walleye or comparable mild white fish. For the aioli, you'll need mayonnaise, honey, and jalapeno.

Mind you, I am improvising here. This is not the coveted recipe from such Fort Wayne restaurants as Club Soda or Paula's On Main.  I know for a fact that they deep-fry their walleye.  I couldn't do this for two reasons. One, I'm getting married and am trying to not deep-fry everything in sight for fear of having back-fat in my wedding dress. Two, I don't have a deep-fryer anyway. 

I melted a bit of butter in a ramekin, and squeezed in half of a lemon.

Next, I ground the bread crumbs* and almonds in my little infant of a food processor.

Baby, you lookin' fine!

On two plates, the lemon-butter and the almond-crusty.

My toes are super-weird.

Cut the walleye into strips (just cut the fillet down the center, long-ways) and dip into the lemon-butter...

...then into the almond-crusty.

Line 'em up in a casserole dish or something comparable.

Bake at 400 until when the fish is cut into with a fork, it flakes off. After 15 minutes, check every 5.

To make the aioli, blend in a food processer 1 c. reduced fat mayo (or regular), 1/4 c. finely diced jalapeno, and 2 T. honey. I could eat this shit with a spoon. For dessert. And breakfast, and lunch, and afternoon tea, and dinner, and after-dinner snack...

Voila!

The night I made this, it was Looptopia in Chicago.

Phew...

Love,

Sophia

*Store-bought bread crumbs work wonderfully because they're really light and crispy. But, I have made my own before by toasting a couple pieces of bread, adding about a tablespoon of flour, and food-processing that.

Salsa a la Alexander!

Fresh, fresh, FRESH Salsa

An Ode to, a Reach for, Summer

Hello, my friends, and welcome to January in Chicago, IL.

Last Friday, it was -17 degrees Fahrenheit outside, and that was before the thrashing, freezing, maiming, violent assault of wind chill.

I need some summer in my life.

In the summer of 2005, right before my senior year of high school, Stuart Alexander and I rekindled our friendship. "Wanna come over and lay on the grass in the sun?" I asked. He did. I made tuna salad sandwiches. And he brought chips and salsa. His dad's homemade salsa.

Ever since that fateful day, John Alexander's salsa makes its way into my family's possession every summer. Stuart is barely allowed into our house unless he is toting a container of this magical chunky elixir of tomatic deliciousness. He brings it as an offering to the shrine that is our fridge. This causes not too much of an imposition, however, as John makes this salsa by the margarita bucket.

Yeah, margarita bucket. Besides the salsa, buckets of margarita define Indiana summers.

Here is that glorious recipe:

1 red onion

1 red bell pepper

3 banana peppers

2 jalapenos

1/2-1 habenero

Cilantro (leaves of 1 bunch)

Parsley (leaves of 1/4-1/2 bunch)

4 cans whole, peeled tomato (trust me on the canned thing, fresh don't work the same)

2 T. fresh garlic

Coarse salt

1 t. celery salt

1/2 t. cayenne pepper

1/2 t. chili powder

(You could, I suppose, add mango or peach to this, if fruity salsa is your thing...)

Here are the glorious components. (Minus the artichoke in the background.)

Oh yeah, baby. Come to mama.

Rinse your vegetables well. In cool water. Mmm, cool water. Like the cool water that fills a lake, or a swimming pool.The cool water that whisks away your coconut-scented suntan lotion. The cool water that dots your skin before it is dried by the hot, hot, hot, hot summer sun. Ugghhhhhh.

Chop up your parsley (left) and cilantro (right). I used flat-leafed parsley, but the curly stuff is fine. I'm pretty sure it's not called "curly-leafed" parsley, but you know what I mean.

Rinse your canned tomatoes in that same cool, refreshing water.

And begin to dice them.

Once through the center, then in rows, then in rows the other way.

You like zee pay-per? (Think Adam Sandler on SNL circa 1994.)

Make an incision around the stem of the pepper, like you do to pumpkins when you're carving them. Pull up to remove the stem.

Then slice the pepper into three or four sections down-ways.

I apologize pre-emptively for using this word...Remove the membrane. Eww.

Now that the membrane is taken care of, julienne (that's a nicer word, eh?) the pepper.

And dice.

Put on gloves beofre you behead your jalapenos! (Or plan on washing your hands REALLY well afterwards. And DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT have any sort of sexual contact! It burns...IT BURNS!! I know from experience, dudes.)

Slice them open!

And remove their membranes as well!

Julienne and dice, dice, dice.

Do this with all of your vegetables, and then force them to copulate in a bowl.

Roll your herbs into a ball, and chop chop chop!

Oh yeah, baby.

And dump 'em in!

Combine your spices in a small bowl.

And have fun and take cool photos as you swirl them together.

Stir those in, too, combining all of the components.

And a squeeze of lime...

OLE!!!! Your salsa is complete!!! Here it is sauteed with some egg whites, topped with sliced avacado, in a lightly fried corn tortilla.

SERVE WITH TEQUILA... OR A BUCKET OF MARGARITA.

Gracias, Alexander family, for the best salsa on Earth.

Adios, amigos!

Sophia